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Professions analysed ...

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A programmer is someone who solves a problem you didn't know

you had in a way you don't understand.


A consultant is someone who takes the watch off your wrist

to tell you the time.


A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun

is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

(Mark Twain)


An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the

things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.


A statistician is someone who is good with numbers but lacks

the personality to be an accountant.


A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a

black cat which isn’t there. (Charles R. Darwin)


A topologist is a man who doesn't know the difference between

a coffee cup and a doughnut.


A lawyer is a person who writes a 10,000 word document and

calls it a "brief."


A psychologist is a man who watches everyone else when a

beautiful woman enters the room.


A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep.


A schoolteacher is a disillusioned woman who used to think

she liked children.


A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in a

way that makes you look forward to the trip.

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A pokemon is a rastafarian Proctologist.

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Once upon a time, in Cape Town, there was a gynaecologist named Dr Lipschitz. There was also a proctologist named Dr. Brown!! And a GP named Dr Gentle!

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