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Vegar

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Vegar

I came across these shipping & other charges instructions and got a migraine on the spot!

 

 

I highlighted the mistakes I found - how many did I miss :nuts: ???? If you recognize this as your own I am happy to help! :blink1:

 

 

 

 

 

SHIPPING FROM HOWICK PLEASE NOTE PRICES MAY INCREASE DUE TO MATERAIL USED ETC, SHIPPING AS FOLLOWS, ,UNDER 1 KG SMALL , R40,00 ,OVER 1KG R50,00 COMBINE POSTAGE PLEASE CONTACT FOR QUOTE, NOT MORE THAN THREE ITEMS IN PARSCEL, DUE TO BREAKAGE, NO COMBINE LARGE ITEMS AT ALL, PLEASE NOTE IF YOU ARE NOT HAPPY WITH POSTING FEES DO NOT BID ON ITEMS AS POST IS NOT NEGOTABLE!!! WINNERS TO PAY WITH 3 DAYS OF WINNIG AUCTION , OR ITEM WILL BE RE IN LISTED. PLEASE NOTE SHIPPING ONCE ALL FEES ARE CLEARED INTO MY BANK ACCOUNT, AND TO REFELCT BEFORE I POST, POSTING IS DONE TWICE A WEEK TUES OR THURSDAYS ONLY PLEASE INSURE YOU'RE PAYMENT BEFORE THESE DAYS ,FAILING TO DO SO WILL RESULT IN A NEAGITVE RATING AND ITEM WILL BE RE IN LISTED,DISCLAMER I AM NOT RESPONBLE FOR YOU'RE PARSCEL AFTER IT LEAVES MY HOME , NOT FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE TO YOU'RE ITEMS BY THE POST OFFICE , I WILL DO MY BEAST AT PROCETING YOU'RE ITEMS . NOTE SHIPPING INCULED PACKING , AND TRACKING BE EMAILED TO YOU , PLEASE KEEP A LOOK AT FOR YOU'RE OWN PARCEL I'M NOT THE POST OFFICE ONCE TRACK IS GIVEN IS UP TO YOU TO CHECK,IF PARCESL COMES BACK TO ME UNCLAIMED PLEASE NOTE RE POSTING SHIPPING FEES APPLY!! PLEASE NOTE GOOD AS AVDERVISTED IF YOU ARE NOT SURE PLEASE ASK BEFORE YOU BID ON ITEMS,THESE ITEMS ARE MOLSTY SECOND HAND AND SOLD AS IS. INSURANCE CAN BE ADD AT THE BUYERS REQUEST AT 2% OF VALUE THIS MIGHT BE A GOOD OPTION BUT TOTALLY UP THE BUYER, AS IF INSURED YOU CAN COMPLAIN TO YOU'RE LOLCAL POST OFFICE FOR ANY LOSS,NOTE PRICES ARE AS ABOVE UNLESS OTHER WISE STATED IF YOU ARE NOT SURE PLEASE ASK,ALL QUESTIONS TO ANSWERED DURING THE DAY BETEEN 8-6PM ONLY, OUTSIDE S.A. PLEASE CONTACT ME FOR QUOTE, FOR SPEED SERVICES IF REQUIRED PLEASE CONTACT ME FOR QUOTE.PLEASE NOTE POSTIVE RATINGS ARE GIVEN TO QUICK PAYERS AND GOOD BUYERS . IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM PLEASE CONTACT ME.LASTLY NO SHIPPING IS DONE ON ANY PUBLIC HOILDAYS AT ALL.NO PICK UPS WELCOME OR COLLECTIONS AT ALL.

:disgusted:

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Seeds for Africa
I WILL DO MY BEAST:

 

Mmm, I wonder who the beast is ?:biggrin: It sounds like the writer needs a "hoilday".

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Cali Craft and Gems

That is one of the most painful experiences I've ever endured - I used to be a proof-reader for a specialist magazine so can pick up errors quite quickly - and Vegar - you still missed a few... :)

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Miss Jewels
I came across these shipping & other charges instructions and got a migraine on the spot!

 

I highlighted the mistakes I found - how many did I miss :nuts: ???? If you recognize this as your own I am happy to help! :blink1:

 

SHIPPING FROM HOWICK PLEASE NOTE PRICES MAY INCREASE DUE TO MATERAIL USED ETC, SHIPPING AS FOLLOWS, ,UNDER 1 KG SMALL , R40,00 ,OVER 1KG R50,00 COMBINE POSTAGE PLEASE CONTACT FOR QUOTE, NOT MORE THAN THREE ITEMS IN PARSCEL, DUE TO BREAKAGE, NO COMBINE LARGE ITEMS AT ALL, PLEASE NOTE IF YOU ARE NOT HAPPY WITH POSTING FEES DO NOT BID ON ITEMS AS POST IS NOT NEGOTABLE!!! WINNERS TO PAY WITH 3 DAYS OF WINNIG AUCTION , OR ITEM WILL BE RE IN LISTED. PLEASE NOTE SHIPPING ONCE ALL FEES ARE CLEARED INTO MY BANK ACCOUNT, AND TO REFELCT BEFORE I POST, POSTING IS DONE TWICE A WEEK TUES OR THURSDAYS ONLY PLEASE INSURE YOU'RE PAYMENT BEFORE THESE DAYS ,FAILING TO DO SO WILL RESULT IN A NEAGITVE RATING AND ITEM WILL BE RE IN LISTED,DISCLAMER I AM NOT RESPONBLE FOR YOU'RE PARSCEL AFTER IT LEAVES MY HOME , NOT FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE TO YOU'RE ITEMS BY THE POST OFFICE , I WILL DO MY BEAST AT PROCETING YOU'RE ITEMS . NOTE SHIPPING INCULED PACKING , AND TRACKING BE EMAILED TO YOU , PLEASE KEEP A LOOK AT FOR YOU'RE OWN PARCEL I'M NOT THE POST OFFICE ONCE TRACK IS GIVEN IS UP TO YOU TO CHECK,IF PARCESL COMES BACK TO ME UNCLAIMED PLEASE NOTE RE POSTING SHIPPING FEES APPLY!! PLEASE NOTE GOOD AS AVDERVISTED IF YOU ARE NOT SURE PLEASE ASK BEFORE YOU BID ON ITEMS,THESE ITEMS ARE MOLSTY SECOND HAND AND SOLD AS IS. INSURANCE CAN BE ADD AT THE BUYERS REQUEST AT 2% OF VALUE THIS MIGHT BE A GOOD OPTION BUT TOTALLY UP THE BUYER, AS IF INSURED YOU CAN COMPLAIN TO YOU'RE LOLCAL POST OFFICE FOR ANY LOSS,NOTE PRICES ARE AS ABOVE UNLESS OTHER WISE STATED IF YOU ARE NOT SURE PLEASE ASK,ALL QUESTIONS TO ANSWERED DURING THE DAY BETEEN 8-6PM ONLY, OUTSIDE S.A. PLEASE CONTACT ME FOR QUOTE, FOR SPEED SERVICES IF REQUIRED PLEASE CONTACT ME FOR QUOTE.PLEASE NOTE POSTIVE RATINGS ARE GIVEN TO QUICK PAYERS AND GOOD BUYERS . IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM PLEASE CONTACT ME.LASTLY NO SHIPPING IS DONE ON ANY PUBLIC HOILDAYS AT ALL.NO PICK UPS WELCOME OR COLLECTIONS AT ALL.

:disgusted:

 

My goodness....you're = you are .... and what's the meaning of the red underlined? Shame, writer needs English classes, never mind a holiday (@GAMU "hoilday") lol

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Vegar

I ignored punctuation and the 'normal' you're instead of your etc. and left the rest for you to spot :blink1:

 

Painful !!!

 

But what is MATERAIL ?? Some sort of rail company ?? My favourite is AVDERVISTED - almost an anagram with a superfluous V - amazing!!

 

I think the person was high on something ... self-defined as a free spirit.

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mellowred
OR ITEM WILL BE RE IN LISTED.

 

Possibly he has a boot camp for spaced out poor spelling items(?)

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lilythepink

I still do proofreading and editing (for a fee!). This poor seller needs help desperately.

 

Imagine wading through all that bull before one can even begin understanding what her terms and conditions are?

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Seeds for Africa

People please you are all reading this wrong! I will try to figure out what the seller is saying here!

 

MATERAIL - His Mate work's on the railways. PARSCEL - He likes Parsley. NO COMBINE - He doesnt have a combine harvester but would like one so he can have lots of time for HOILDAYS. NEGOTABLE & BEAST - He doesnt have Ne Goat but has ne Beast.

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kyle2

Amazing, I do make the occasional spelling mistake myself, but WoW, that’s just..........wow.

The poor spellchecker will probably have a breakdown.

Edited by kyle2
spelling - LOL

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amcintyre

It's more than spelling. The entire thing would need to be reworked. Perhaps something like .... (I'm sure that there are spelling and grammatical errors in my revised wording as well :unsure: )

 

Items are shipped from Howick. Please note that the postage price includes the cost of any packing material used. Shipping as follows: under 1 kg (small items) R40,00; over 1kg R50,00. Include an additional 2% for insurance to be taken out on your items. Should you wish to combine items, contact me for a combined postage quote. No more than three items can be combined in one parcel. Large items cannot be combined. Quotes for posting outside of South Africa or for Speed Services are also available. Unfortunately, we do not permit collections.

 

Do not place bids if you are unhappy with these terms – shipping terms are non-negotiable. Winning bidders are to make payment within three days of close of auction. Items will be shipped as soon as payment is reflected in my bank account. Posting only takes place on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

 

Should you not meet the above criteria with regard to payment, you will receive a negative rating and your won items will be re-listed.

 

Although extreme care is taken in handling and packing items, I cannot remain responsible after postage has taken place. Your tracking number will be emailed to you as soon as postage has taken place. Please check regularly on the SAPO tracking site to monitor to the progress of your posted items.

 

Questions and correspondence will be answered between 8:00 to 18:00.

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kyle2
It's more than spelling. The entire thing would need to be reworked. Perhaps something like .... (I'm sure that there are spelling and grammatical errors in my revised wording as well :unsure: )

 

Items are shipped from Howick. Please note that the postage price includes the cost of any packing material used. Shipping as follows: under 1 kg (small items) R40,00; over 1kg R50,00. Include an additional 2% for insurance to be taken out on your items. Should you wish to combine items, contact me for a combined postage quote. No more than three items can be combined in one parcel. Large items cannot be combined. Quotes for posting outside of South Africa or for Speed Services are also available. Unfortunately, we do not permit collections.

 

Do not place bids if you are unhappy with these terms – shipping terms are non-negotiable. Winning bidders are to make payment within three days of close of auction. Items will be shipped as soon as payment is reflected in my bank account. Posting only takes place on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

 

Should you not meet the above criteria with regard to payment, you will receive a negative rating and your won items will be re-listed.

 

Although extreme care is taken in handling and packing items, I cannot remain responsible after postage has taken place. Your tracking number will be emailed to you as soon as postage has taken place. Please check regularly on the SAPO tracking site to monitor to the progress of your posted items.

 

Questions and correspondence will be answered between 8:00 to 18:00.

 

Well done for sorting that mess, can I use it?:wink:

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amcintyre
Well done for sorting that mess, can I use it?:wink:

 

Sure. But I think that it is still too bulky :smile:

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lilythepink

Well done, Kyle! Now perhaps someone can get hold of the seller and ask her/him to thank you!

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kyle2
Well done, Kyle! Now perhaps someone can get hold of the seller and ask her/him to thank you!

 

Thanks Lilly, but I didn't fix it, amcintyre did.

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mellowred
Sure. But I think that it is still too bulky :smile:

 

Bulky stuff ... maybe it's just because I don't list and sell much so haven't experienced the problems of other sellers, but I can't understand why sellers do this. The important bits get lost. Crazy stuff.

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TS Ron

Thanks Kyle what fee do you charge when I am stressed out I need some one like you.When I have five people going at me at once when I am busy typing something.

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Lukeness

Items are shipped from Howick. Postage prices include the cost of packing materials. Shipping prices: under 1 kg R40,00; over 1kg R50,00.Add 2% for insurance for your items. Contact me for a combined postage quote for up to 3 items. Large items cannot be combined. Ask for prices for posting outside of SA or Speed Services. Tracking details will be emailed to you. Check the SAPO tracking site to monitor to the progress of your posted items. No collections.

Terms are non-negotiable. Do not bid if you are unhappy with them. Payment to be made within 72 hours of close of auction failing which a negative rating will be issued and the items re-listed. Items are shipped, after payment reflects in my account, on Tuesdays and Thursdays only.

While care is taken in handling and packing items, I am not responsible for items once posted.

Questions and correspondence will be answered between 8am to 6pm.

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jinxster78
I ignored punctuation and the 'normal' you're instead of your etc. and left the rest for you to spot :blink1:

 

Painful !!!

 

But what is MATERAIL ?? Some sort of rail company ?? My favourite is AVDERVISTED - almost an anagram with a superfluous V - amazing!!

 

I think the person was high on something ... self-defined as a free spirit.

 

Its an old jargon thats coming back again.... in the past having sex on sleeper trains was materail...... but nowadays since sex can be performed anywhere they brought it for the new Gautrain hehe. So one can only hope your new item wasn't used to aid in such activity during transport...lol

 

Note this is all just bulldust.... disclaimer hehe, but feel free to inspect packaging material for white stains.... after all you are paying for it included in the price. Hehe

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Vegar
Its an old jargon thats coming back again.... in the past having sex on sleeper trains was materail...... but nowadays since sex can be performed anywhere they brought it for the new Gautrain hehe.

 

Oh! MATE-RAIL Now I get it ...:awesome:

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moppies

Mag ek ook 'n "stuiwer in die armbeurs" gooi?

 

My spelling is at times also not that good (don't even talk about the use of English) - but gee-whiz - I saw this on Wednesdays auction and could only shake my head:

"Elefints"

"Cammel"

 

If you can't spell - get a dictionary!!

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Vegar

Get a dictionary ... or at least pay attention to the spell check :wacko: ???

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MiemsJewels
Get a dictionary ... or at least pay attention to the spell check :wacko: ???

 

@Vegar, so we don't have to worry about our tenses and stuff, just as long as our spelling are correct.:nuts:

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StudMuffinsMissus

Hate bad spelling...it's like wearing underwear 2 sizes too small, just gets under your skin. Saying that, my 10 year old spells better than my husband.

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rezizter

gosh that is a lot of mistakes

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MiemsJewels

Ek het vanoggend in 'n slegte bui opgestaan. So vandag gaan ek uitpak!! NIE ALMAL IS ENGELS NIE. SOMMIGE KAN NIE SPEL NIE, EN ONS "TENSES" IS OOK UP TO SH*T. PROBEER OM ONS NIE AF TE BREEK NIE, PROBEER ONS LIEWER HELP OM DIT REG TE STEL!

EK KEN SUPER SLIM MENSE WAT NIE KAN SPEL NIE.

ONS PROBEER TENMINSTE! ONGELUKKIG IS AL DIE AFRIKAANS NA 1994 AMPER VERBAN!

EK SIEN BITTER MIN DAT 'N AFRIKAANSE PERSOON 'N ENGELSE PERSOON AFBREEK WAT TEN MINSTE AFRIKAANS PROBEER PRAAT EN SKRYF.

JARE TERUG HET GEEN ENGELSE OU GELAG VIR ONS "ENGELS" NIE! DIE AFRIKAANS SPREKENDES HET GELAG VIR DIE ENGELS SPREKENDES SE AFRIKAANS!

PROBEER ONS LIEWER HELP! MOENIE ONS AFBREEK NIE.

 

DEESDAE IS DIT DIE NORM DAT DAT AGTER AF GELAG WORD VIR ONS!

VAN NOU AF SKRYF EK SLEGS AFRIKAANS! VIR DIE WAT MY NIE VERSTAAN NIE.......TOUGHEES!!

Edited by MiemsJewels

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